Coming to terms with the fact that even though things seem bad now… they’ve actually… always been bad.
I am writing this on Thursday, November 7th. Yesterday morning I woke up, opened my phone, and learned that Donald Trump would be the 47th president of the United States.
The result wasn’t unexpected in the moment, but, in the grand scheme of things, I guess it was. Going into the election, with all the information available to the public about Trump’s alleged criminal history and confirmed criminal charges, with all the reports of new voter registration skyrocketing following the announcement of Harris’s campaign, I didn’t think another Trump term was likely. But I remembered 2016, when Trump was first elected, and I remembered when I didn’t think it was likely then either. I wouldn’t allow myself to be shocked the way I was then, and as I watched the results roll in on Tuesday, as the first snow of the season plummeted over the Denver area, I felt the hope that had been simmering inside me since Biden dropped out of the race dwindle and die.
So, I wasn’t surprised on Tuesday morning. I was angry. I was disheartened. I felt kind of hopeless. But I wasn’t surprised.
I told myself I wouldn’t call out of work if he won, even though I’d considered it, but I couldn’t even do that. It snowed through the night and it persisted. Trying to take my little two-wheel-drive hatchback out there would have been like sending a hockey puck across a rink. I called out.
I tried not to feel too miserable all day. I went to a coffee shop with my friend. I worked on some list-icles for the site. I read my book. I cleaned. I also doom-scrolled (I’m not perfect); I checked all the stories on my Instagram, I unfollowed the people I saw rejoicing, then I watched a couple-dozen minute-long brain-rot videos from my recommendations. I read a few news articles; “HERE ARE THE TOP TEN ATROCITIES AGAINST HUMANKIND TRUMP PLANS TO COMMIT DURING HIS SECOND TERM,” and “THE IMPACTS OF CLIMATE CHANGE ARE HORRIFYING AND UNDENIABLE AND RESEARCH SHOWS THAT THINGS ARE ONLY GOING TO GET WORSE”. I got dinner with the person I’m seeing. We walked to a nearby bar, I had tofu tacos, chili cheese fries, and a glass of wine.
I tried to go to work again today and I couldn’t. I tried to drive my car and everything, and it truly was like a puck on a rink. I was sliding through intersections, swerving over lanes, so as I approached my second turn onto Evans, I decided again that it wasn’t worth it. I came back home. Again, I got some breakfast at the coffee shop. Again, I tried not to feel too miserable.
I’ve had a lot of time to think.
Duality is important. These election results scare me. I am scared for my country, I am scared for my home, I am scared for people I do not know and have not met, I am scared for people in my communities, I am scared for my family and I am scared for myself. A lot of people are in the same boat as me right now. As scared as I am, yesterday and today I made an effort to put love and joy first. Love for my friends and the people around me and joy for the little things I have in my life that will not be taken away– a cup of coffee and a meal from my local restaurants, my time with my loved ones, my books, and my words. Fear is not something I will let suffocate me, because that is how people remain submissive.
For those of us who feel hopeless and defeated, it is important not to forget that while Donald Trump is a click-bait-shock-value-youtube-scam of a human being, he is not interesting or original. While that fact might not detract from his badness, I find comfort in it.
The fact is: the United States is an ugly nation with an ugly history, rooted in fascist principles and genocidal practices, and that would be true regardless of who won the 2024 election. The American Dream, as it has been sold to us the citizens, and the rest of the world alike, is a lie. Anyone who read Of Mice and Men or The Great Gatsby in tenth grade could tell you that much. Further, while we highlight in our history curriculums how the U.S. broke free from the oppressive shackles of monarchy, from the barbarism of totalitarianism, to pave a new, enlightened, democratic path these same curriculums fail to acknowledge that no society that systemically demolished the ones that came before it while also systemically capturing, enslaving, and selling millions of human beings can ever truly be enlightened or free from barbarism.
The idea that the U.S. is superior in any way to any other place in the world is propaganda, this should come as no surprise, but the reason that the propagation of this lie is so successful is because there are many people who live in the U.S. who experience an acceptable/good quality of life. Acceptable/Good seems pretty great when it’s being compared to the quality of life a lot of people living in countries devastated by war or famine experience. However, when you consider the number of wars the U.S. has found itself involved in (at least four at the time of writing this and thirteen in my lifetime( I’m 24)), and the places where these wars take place, and the kinds of military action the U.S. takes, you can connect the dots and find that a lot of these places we think of as “worse than here” are only “worse than here” because the U.S. is either wholly/or fully responsible for destroying them. The U.S. is a propaganda-war-machine. The two are historically intertwined, but the propaganda has passed the point of just being media. The wars are creating real-life propaganda now.
(Make no mistake, everything is propaganda. This blog post is propaganda. This whole website is propaganda. Every movie and TV show you watch is propaganda. Everything has an agenda and everyone wants to make you believe something. It is up to the individuals to decide who or what they believe and why.)
We have established that the U.S. is not above alienation tactics. We can see the irreparable damage these tactics have caused to Indigenous, Black, and AAPI communities across our history. We are witnessing a new-er era of anti-hispanic, anti-latino, and anti-Muslim hate in the last twenty-some years. These are just the things happening inside. It’s easy to forget that the U.S. propaganda-war-machine feeding us xenophobic lies about migrants or whomever, is the same U.S. propaganda-war-machine that has historically made a hobby out of finding innovative new ways to devastate populations overseas. Then they turn around and look back at us with big puppy-dog eyes and say See? Aren’t you so lucky to live here and not there?
The U.S. isn’t a good place, it’s good to some people. The American Dream might have existed for a little while, but it only existed for a handful of people and it stopped existing for anyone new after Reagan was elected. The boomers got the bulk of it, the X-ers got some of what is left, the Millennials got extra-fucked by the 2008 recession, but they would have been fucked either way, and the Gen Z-ers are fucked too, especially those of us who didn’t come from American Dream families. Those who are privileged enough to experience it, are grasping onto this acceptable-quality of life with white knuckles, sweating, shaking, because now it seems someone has come who wants to rip it away from us and make it worse. When whatever comes to pass does, when whatever rights we previously had are taken away or the economy collapses or the nukes go off, the people who have no financial assets or savings, the people living paycheck to paycheck in this acceptable way will be the most affected, but even then their quality of living won’t be near as bad as those individuals in the very lowest tax bracket, who have and will continue to experience the U.S. as a third-world country.
And when or if that time comes we shall accept it. Because this is our doing. In a 248-year history, a nation has countless opportunities to turn away from the path of destruction and inhumanity and toward the path of enlightenment and community. The U.S. has chosen the paths of division and destruction at too many intersections. The things that will happen in the next four years will not be random and they will not be the sole result of Trump’s election but the result of years and years of the fascist disease that has coursed through our nation’s blood since its conception.
Okay, that was grim.
As I said earlier, duality is important. So, instead of leaving off on the most depressing note possible, I’d like to end on a glimmer of hope.
I believe that one of the best things we can do to save this fucked-fucked-fucked-fucked-fucked-fucked fucked-up world we live in is to turn our attention inward, toward our communities. That’s what we here at BottleRag.org are all about.
First: A friendly reminder to vote in your local elections. That means state and city. By staying active in local politics you can ensure that you A.) always know what’s going on and what’s at stake around you and B.) Your vote is more likely to make an impact locally, and seeing the impact of your vote in your community may act as a small reminder that democracy isn’t completely doomed as we know it.
Second: Pay attention to your local art scene. Remember that you aren’t alone. There are people all over Denver, Fort Collins, and Boulder creating music, art, theater, broadcasts, and magazines, and it gives me hope every time I see it. To stay involved, I go to local open mics, shows for local bands, art shows, and local plays. I manage all this by having really cool friends, but you can manage this by checking out our artists’ tab and our events calendar!
If you want to be especially radical, cancel your streaming services. Refusing to give the massive media conglomerates your hard-earned proletariat dollar is a great way to say “fuck you” to the corporate oligarchy that runs our nation. You can supplement your entertainment void by staying active in the aforementioned local art scene, but if that proves to be too draining for your social battery, just pirate movies!
Together we are stronger, and together we can force the change we want to see in our community, on a small scale. Things are bad, but they aren’t the worst they will ever be. Corny post. Bye.
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